For almost all new parents, the first 6 weeks following the birth of your baby can be full of ups and downs. As much as it is exciting and wondrous, getting to ‘know’ your baby can also be a challenging and uncertain time. Expect to sometimes feel overwhelmed, unsure and somewhat confused as you spend time perfecting and adapting to feeding, changing nappies, burping, responding to your baby’s cries (and almost every noise he/she makes), cuddling, bathing and loving your baby. You will also spend a lot of time trying to communicate with your baby and trying to working out what it is he/she is telling you.
Within these first few weeks your baby can be very unpredictable and some of his/her behaviours, at times will become almost impossible to decode! It can be difficult, especially coupled with lack of sleep, to feel confident in your new role of parenting. Not to mention the abundance of advice, (mostly from well wishers and helpers) you will need to sift through. No wonder first time parents are confused!
Here are some helpful hints to help you understand your newborns behaviours, boost your confidence and help you to stay sane during these initial weeks of uncertainty:
- Your baby’s brain develops after he/she is born. Brain development is at 25% when born. Your baby’s brain and nervous system will start to mature after birth. You will witness lots of changes over the first six weeks
- During the first few weeks you will, more than likely, witness your baby being sleepy, only waking for feeds. At this age, more than likely, he/she will settle without much fuss and will sleep well in between feeds.
- Your baby is born with many reflexes such as, rooting reflex, sucking reflex, startle reflex, grasp reflex just to name a few. These reflexes are responsive to stimulation and touch. You may notice your baby turning his/her head to the side when you brush your fingers along their cheek or the side of their mouth, even when not hungry. Reflexes will diminish over the next several months.
- Because your baby’s brain and nervous system is immature he/she will be quickly affected by stimulation and may find it hard to switch off when overstimulated. (The ‘witching hour’ is one example)
- There are 2 functions to your baby’s cry:
- Survival. To make sure all of his/her needs are met.
- Stress or tension release. When your baby has been fed, changed and burped sometimes he/she will still cry. This is when he/she needs to release some tension or may find it hard to switch off from stimuli. You will experience times when no matter what you do you cannot stop your baby from crying. Sometimes the more you try the worse it gets! Rest assured he/she is not crying as a direct response to what you are practically doing, but crying in an attempt to shut out stimulation.
- Crying peaks at 3-4 weeks. Your baby will appear more alert and will take in, the world around him/her, stimulation increasing. You may start to witness more ‘tension release’ crying. This is normal and will settle down again within a few weeks.
- From 3-4 weeks it is normal for your baby to be awake at the end of feeding more often than not. It is OK to put him/her to bed awake and encourage settling when they have had a good feed and are appearing relaxed.
- It is normal for it to take up to 45 minutes to 1 hour, sometimes, for your baby to achieve deep sleep. Always try to settle him/her in a consistent fashion for at least 30 minutes before giving up and trying something different. Your baby will benefit from consistency.
- During the first 6-8 weeks, whilst your baby is maturing, you may not always be successful in encouraging him/her to go to sleep. You will find settling will not be successful once or twice a day. This is normal until babies learn how to sleep.
- It is normal for your baby to demand feeds every 2 to 4 hours around the clock. Young baby’s tummies are very small and food is quickly digested. They are able to hold more in their tummies and digestion will slow down around 8-12 weeks of age. Until then ‘cluster feeding’ (lots of feeds closely spaced) is normal
There is no doubt that during the first six weeks, getting to know and care for your baby will, at times, be daunting. RELAX and be mindful; the way he/she is behaving is all normal during this initial stage of development. As your baby matures and develops through his/her milestones, you will discover their unique traits, personality and behavioural characteristics. Through bonding, practice and patience you will become more confident and comfortable within your new parental role. Enjoy the journey!
Jennifer Hamilton and Jane Surgenor
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Thursday, 17 June 2010