Parenting Australia

The Preschool Question

When Lucas turned four, Alec and I diligently attended all the information evenings and orientations – we drew up charts, discussed pros and cons – and still we didn't reach a decision, so finally we went with our "gut feel".

Both Alec and I felt comfortable and at ease in one particular school – it didn't have state-of-the-art equipment or the biggest playground, but we could imagine our children sitting in the classrooms, playing footy on the oval, having detention in the Principal's office… (just kidding – I hope!).

So we filled in the paperwork and spent several hours unearthing the birth certificate… and enrolled our eldest son.

That turned out to be the easy part… as naïve parents from the UK we now faced a new dilemma – to send him or hold him back!?

Both Alec and I went to school at four - it seemed right to send Lucas. And surely Lucas (and I) would go slightly crazy with yet another year of playgroups, parks and pre-school.

But his kindy teachers advised we hold him back – 'academically he's ready, but socially he isn't' they said.

And it seemed EVERYONE had an opinion and a story to share…. So after spending the first six months of the year choosing a school, we had to spend the next six months wondering whether to actually send him!

Luckily the school had a homelink program which meant Lucas would spend three mornings in the school on a trial with all the other preschoolers.

On the first morning, he clung to me and seemed out of his depth, so after chatting with the teachers our decision was made – we'd hold him back.

I did have pangs of doubt though – in January, when I saw the other kindy kids starting school or when someone from my mother's group told me how their child was enjoying lessons, but generally Lucas had a great year and I loved having him around (honest!).

So when he finally started school, I thought all our problems would be over. But to my dismay, he was bored and rebelled against the structure of school (too many years of free play).

In the end the school counselor ran a test and we discovered Lucas was "gifted" - and by the end of his kindy year he was reading Year Five books.

It was a bumpy ride for his first few years – socially he had lots of friends, but academically we had to continually find extra projects to stretch him.

He's now finishing Year Three and has finally found his footing.

He's had a fantastic year – he's popular, confident and made it to the finals of the public speaking competition, the spelling bee and is in the school band.

I asked him recently whether he wished he was in Year Four. 'I prefer being in Year Three,' he said. 'I think I'd feel a bit left out if I was in Year Four because of my age.'

So – now I feel we made the right decision and I'm happy we held him back, but to all those parents facing the same dilemma – I don't envy you!

And I made sure my other two children weren't born between March and May!

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* Katie is a mum-of-three and has just started a new blog www.rollercoastermum.com.au so please check it out, as she wants to hear from other mums!

She is a yoga teacher and author and runs Yoga Babes (www.yogababes.com.au)

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