Ah, sleep, I remember thee so well

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Ah, sleep, I remember thee so well

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madcowprofilepic Sleep? What is this “sleep” you speak of.

As, sleep, I remember thee so well.

Actually, that’s I lie. I don’t remember you that well at all. Right now, I don’t remember much of anything at all that well.

Highly likely a result of prolonged sleep deprivation. I don’t think I’ve had anything resembling a sleep for approximately nine and half years.

I’m one of those awful First Time Mums whose baby Slept Through from the Beginning. I got some decent sleeps way back then. Or, I would have had my boobs not embarked on a suicide mission, slowly filling up to exploding point and leaving me in a massively huge wet spot.

I digress.

It’s been near on ten years since I’ve had a decent sleep. Or, really, anything that could technically be described as “Sleep”.

Save for the one time I left the house for three days, and crashed at a friend’s. Literally crashed. For 24 hours.

What I do have experience with are states such as:

·         Napping
·         Resting
·         Dozing
·         Cat napping
·         Nodding off
·         Dropping off
·         Passing out on the couch at 6.23pm and waking with a start to discover the kids watching something on TV that I don’t want them watching, playing the Wii, or hiding under their bed on the DS that I’ve forbid them from playing.

I really wish I could say that I’d mastered the art of the Power Nap, but if I’m being perfectly honest, I’ve not mastered the art of “power” anything.

I’m too tired. And Power Napping, I believe, requires some kind of intent and scheduling into the chaotic day. Or, at the very least, finding 15 minutes in a row of quality time to power nap.

Now, I’m just off to power up the coffee machine …

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Mad Cow (also known as Amanda) is the mum to three boys, wife to a chef, writer, speaker, founder of Australia’s Bad Mother’s Club and Real Mums, a Live Positively Ambassador for Coca-Cola and, in her spare time, she creates sculptures from left over WeetBix. Her (almost) daily accounts of parenting can be found on her blog Diary of a Mad Cow.