Parenting Australia

Allergy Angst

Angst isn’t a big enough word.  Anguish?  Anxiety?  Fear?  Sorrow?  A lot of words come to mind when thinking about what my son’s life threatening allergies mean to me.  After five years, I can finally add Hope to the list.

Five years ago we went to the allergy clinic for a routine skin prick test and came out a family forever changed.  We returned home needing to re-assess the contents of our kitchen cupboards, our fridge, our craft materials, our toys, our bath products, our creams, our shampoos, our clothing, our travel plans, our childcare plans, our home, our lifestyle…our life.

For the longest time it was hard to see beyond the allergies.  Allergies are such an omnipresent concern because they show up multiple times throughout each and every day – each time my son needs to eat or drink in fact.  We’ve been dealing with the allergies every day for five years now and I’m glad to say it does get easier.

Small steps are major victories.  The last skin prick test suggested we could try soy and fish for the first time.  Six months on, he has soy milk every day, a much wider range of food to eat, and eats fish crumbed and fried!  My goodness, haven’t those two foods opened up a whole new world.  We have actually booked an overseas holiday, his first ever, on the strength of these advancements.  It means we will be able to feed him (I won’t say easily, but easier).  Most importantly, he will travel to meet his great grandmother for the first time – all because of soy and fish.

Five years on, there are so many more allergy-free products to buy.  Today I picked up a packet of heart shaped shortbread biscuits, completely allergy-free (Orgran Premium brand, if you’re wondering).  We have faced our first five weeks of school, incident-free.  We go to the beach now and no eczema follows us home.  We host birthday parties with a completely allergy-free menu and no-one spots the difference.  

Of course I still worry.  I worry every day for my precious boy.  The day I don’t worry is the day he might get an accidental exposure.  It is a fine line between managing the anxiety of it all, and still allowing him the opportunity to enjoy the things every child should. Having a child with allergies brings some small insight into the difficulties ordinary families are faced with every day.  Perhaps this is why this happened to us, so we could have more empathy for families who are really doing it tough. Our children walk, talk, sing, dance, grow, learn, feel, hear, see etc.  Lots of kids can’t.  I understand now that there are so many parents walking amongst us who are just simply exhausted each and every day, just with the weight of everything they have to think about, let alone do. 

I look forward to the day when I don’t think about allergies at all.  But today I will embrace the immense good fortune we have to live in a community that helps us keep him safe.  And today and everyday I will celebrate the most perfect little boy I could ever dream of having as my own.

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Mihiri Udabage is a 30-something mother of two, now feeling old enough to use terms like 30-something. She loves Sundays more than Saturdays but is grateful for both. She hates ironing. In between growing up two little citizens, Mihiri spends time working on her on-line Fair Trade and Organic business www.generationwonder.com, volunteering for global charity Room to Read, doing canteen duty at school, and entering Fun Runs she has no hope of actually running. Mihiri has a husband who thinks she is loopy but who supports her anyway. She wishes she had written Twilight but acknowledges that could never happen because she can never remember her dreams. However, Mihiri is about to enrol in a screenwriting course that will see her write a movie that will knock Twilight for a six. Mihiri continues to dream...

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