Parenting Australia

Going To School With Allergies

Right now I am facing the dilemma shared by many parents at this time of year. To send or not to send? I am so torn about whether or not my son is ready to start school next year. All the usual voices in my head have surfaced – Is he too young? Will he cope in the playground? Will he make friends? Will he sit still in class? Even how he’ll manage his shoelaces has crossed my mind (thank goodness for velcro). My biggest concern is how he will manage his food. He has multiple and severe food allergies, and to go from a carefully controlled home and preschool to a school environment with a canteen and hundreds of kids eating and sharing food, scares the crap out of me.

Mihiri Udabage

I know our family deals with food in a different way to most. We are a family that carries the statistic that in Australia,1 in 20 children have food allergies (Australasian Society of Clinical Immunology and Allergy). We check food labels to make sure his allergens aren’t present as ingredients or possible traces. We avoid certain aisles in the shops because there is nothing there that we could safely invite into our home. We prepare most food from scratch; there is no point having handy packets or takeaway menus in our home. We consider his every meal of the day and where we are going to get it from before stepping out the door in the morning - grabbing food on the run is not an option.

We have been preparing our son to manage his food at school for a few years now. A big load will land on his small shoulders next year and he will need to be assertive about his safety. He already will politely refuse food offered at a party until one of his parents says he can have it. He knows to speak up when he starts to scratch and itch. He would never accept another child’s offer to share their food. At least I don’t think he would. It’s always the unlikely scenario about what could happen in an unguarded moment that magnifies in my head until it is the worst possible outcome.

One thing that keeps me sane is knowing that we have the great gift of living in a community. It is the community that I will turn to help me keep my son safe at school. I have already met with the school principal and had a discussion about allergy policies in the school, and the management plan we will put in place. I have gotten myself on canteen duty this year so I know how food is prepared and can be familiar with what food he can and can’t have. It helps if the other canteen mums know me and my concerns. I will be able to introduce them to my son and his older sister, so they will keep a careful eye out to make sure he makes the right choices at the canteen, hopefully with his sister by his side. I have bought some valuable resources from Anaphylaxis Australia and will share them with the school. I have decided that next year I will put myself forward as Class Parent so I can take a lead role in managing ‘the food issue’ in his class.

The parents we already know in our preschool and school community think hard to avoid allergens when we are at their homes. They invite me to bring food to their homes and share it with the other children so no-one misses out. They accept without question the cup of tea with rice milk that I can offer them at our home. They share with me when they find new product in the shops that hopefully, hopefully, our son can eat. Our teachers receive gratefully the allergy resources we give them and embrace learning how to manage any exposures. They remind other families via newsletters that no nuts can be consumed on the grounds and other parents read that and nod their heads. They understand.

What is understood is that we are all trying to do the same thing – protect the children from harm. For my son, we try and protect him from the harm of rashes, vomiting, difficulty breathing, or death if untreated. I can’t do that without their co-operation and so my community joins with me to achieve that. For other families the possible harm is in exposing their children to the scene of a friend in difficulty. Or of being the harm that could have been avoided. They can’t do that alone, so I make sure I have done all I can to share my knowledge and resources with them . The wonderful thing about community is that in taking care of each other’s needs, our own needs are met. Whilst not everyone is carrying a diagnosis, we are all managing the risk. In my community, every family is managing food allergies. We are no longer 1 in 20, we are one for one.

Resources: Anaphylaxis Australia – www.allergyfacts.org.au

What does your school do to manage food allergies? What tips about managing school children with allergies can you share with Mihiri as she prepares to send her son to school next year?

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Mihiri Udabage is a 30-something mother of two, now feeling old enough to use terms like 30-something. She loves Sundays more than Saturdays but is grateful for both. She hates ironing. In between growing up two little citizens, Mihiri spends time working on her on-line Fair Trade and Organic business www.generationwonder.com, volunteering for global charity Room to Read, doing canteen duty at school, and entering Fun Runs she has no hope of actually running. Mihiri has a husband who thinks she is loopy but who supports her anyway. She wishes she had written Twilight but acknowledges that could never happen because she can never remember her dreams. However, Mihiri is about to enrol in a screenwriting course that will see her write a movie that will knock Twilight for a six. Mihiri continues to dream...

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